Long awaited.

Finally, I was able to grab my husband and have him take a picture of me at the stage I am at in my pregnancy. WOW, you will see how big my belly has grown. It is crazy to me. I normally only see the look down view, so to see an actual picture from the side. WOW!!!

Here it is.

There it is. My growing belly with my growing son in it. I have less them 5 weeks left. I go to the Dr. tomorrow and that will be 1 month from my due date. I am really hoping he comes early, but you know it is just a waiting game. Kinda like the jack-n-the-box, you keep going and going, but you never know when it will POP!!

Pray for me. I have been learning alot about myself over these past 35 weeks. I did not think I was a proud person, or care much if I was heavy or overweight. I thought I was pretty content with my looks. But I have become upset, saddened by my growing belly and other growing areas(if you know what I am talking about). I know I should not be, it is part of being pregnant, but nobody told me the changes your body goes through during pregnancy. Yes, you chest grows and your belly grows and of course my butt has grown, but no one tells you, what it looks like, the stretching, the veins and other things like that without clothes on. It is not a pretty sight. No one prepared me for these changes, no book tells you about these changes. I have really be struggling with my whole body. Some days are all right, but other day, wow, it is very hard. I struggle back and forth, with oh this is worth it, you have a baby growing inside you, but then I think, when will I even be able to shop in a regular clothing shop again. See, all bad thoughts and struggles, but a process for me.

I had to talk with God this morning and just tell him, I am not happy about this, but then to, he reminded me, I created you, I have created this stage in your life and body and I am BLESSING you with a little miracle. It is a great thing to know I have a little son, growing inside me and my body is changing to accommodate him. I am having to realize, that, you know it is alright. God has done a miracle here, and I am thankful for it. I can't say it is easy, and I know I have some MAJOR more body changes going on in the next couple months, ones I can't even imagine, but hopefully, I can take my eyes off my physical body and focus on what counts, my heart and what is going on inside me and the miracle God has blessed me with, Landon.

I am asking you to pray for me though, as I know these struggles and thoughts will not just go away and I know or have heard some of the changes that will take place over the next 3-6 months. Pray with me, that I will focus on what is important, my heart, my new son that is coming soon and not let, trying to get back to my normal body be as important or my outward appearance be my focus.

Thanks for listening to whats in my head. Maybe now, I can enjoy this stage of my pregnancy and enjoy the ever growing belly under my shirt, and the uncomfortableness of sleeping, bending over and leaning over. Please just pray with me.